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No Longer Furious

Bench Racing

by Ryan King

So, My Speed Demon finally caught up with me.

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One moment I was happily playing a rousing game of count the carpet fibers while sitting under the dash of the Saturn (see the previous Bench Racing entry, the Issue with Idols for more info on that development), the next moment I heard the droning of My Speed Demon and looked up to find it sitting on the passenger seat right in front of my face.

Suffice it to say there wasn't much of a struggle. Somehow, I feel emasculated being roughed up by an idol the size of a softball. I just want to say in my own defense, it does have other worldly powers and what it did to me makes the Matrix fighting sequences look like a couple of six year olds on a play ground.

What it all comes down to is that My Speed Demon and I have come to an understanding. It's not mad at me anymore and I have to have a fast car running immediately. In return, My Speed Demon granted me permission to fix the problems the Saturn was having with the smoking and the rough running (see the previous Bench Racing entries Revenge of My Speed Demon and the Issue with Idols respectively).

No, My Speed Demon didn't help, much like the dealership. Except, it didn't charge $115 to scratch its head. So, I guess I should be thankful.

Instead I had to turn to my friend and automotive guru, Jack, who pointed me towards the PCV and, over the phone, was able to diagnose it. The rough running was just the spark plugs fouled from the engine burning so much oil.

So, the moral of the story is that I should never tick off My Speed Demon by buying a Saturn.

It hurts.

Me.

A lot.

Ryan

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